Life has been quite empty these few weeks. Not quite. As much as I would like to pour out what has been going on these past few weeks, I think an open blog is not the source.

Anyway, I think most of you people who knows me quite well or who has been in touch with me would know what I am talking about. I guess I finally found my weakness, I tend to like things to go fast fast fast. The wait sometimes keeps me anxiously uncomfortable. Perhaps you can add “drama king” to the mix. But I guess its all part and parcel of surviving.

Even if many a times I sulk over stuff, I have a redeeming quality of bouncing back quite fast with a bang. I have an in-built never say die, fight to the bloody end mentality that I think gives me the edge over most other people. I think its pure will to succeed and pure ambition that has been keeping me doing what I have been doing. Chasing opportunities like how Alice chases the rabbit down the rabbit hole. It keeps me in line even when I am being faced with stiff office politics, power plays and other “not what you would expect after you are done with school” stuff.

At times this quality is good and at other times, its rather annoying if I should say so myself. I am trying to be more self conscious about all this and improving myself as I go along. I did anyway “managed anger” when I was younger. Well, very soon I will be let loose in a world of raving beasts hungry to outbeat, outlive and outlast. Unfortunately or fortunately I still have much of my conscience intact.

I wonder if the room still has room for conscience in crazy times like these.